This month I have been exposed to four different people whose journeys ended before they should have. These people were drowning in their own darkness. These people either had addictions or suffered from a mental anguish of health that took them down a road they never intended. These four precious souls were all struggling. Their struggles were known in many cases, but in others they were not.
This month, I am 8 months into my 39th year of life. (Meaning, I turn 40 in four months! PARTY!) However, I would be remiss to not pause and take account for the miracle it is that I have even arrived here. Mental health is real. What we don’t understand or want to speak to is that all mental, spiritual, physical and emotional health are interwoven into the human body. We are either healthy in all or unhealthy in all – they do not work separately. As I have attended two funerals this month for lives gone way too short, I am faced with my own reality. Life is short. Life is hard. Life can be torment. But God is good.
In my own journey there have been seasons when it was all too overwhelming and I didn’t see how I could possibly make it through. There have been many nights of weeping in my own prayer closet begging God to make it all go away or to take me home. There have been moments when in my own darkness I have begged for God to make it all end. And God met me there.
My own curse is the struggle to live in the right now and not in the yesterday or tomorrow. I am sure that I am not alone. My own curse is to make sure everyone is taken care of and that all is as it should be. My own curse is to pour out mental anguish to cover all the bases and forget nothing. My own curse is to create the best fun, most efficient and productive space, while also leaving a lasting impression legacy. My own curse is to pretend to be God to the point of exhaustion and then remember that God is actually God and I am called to much less. My own curse is overanalyzing every human interaction to the point of paralysis instead of releasing it all and walking in true freedom. My own curse is to wonder if I will ever be enough for those in my life. My own curse is to constantly allow the enemy to whisper lies to my own soul and then have them on a highlight reel in my own personal television behind the eyes. My own curse is creating an image of myself that no one in the real world has ever thought or saw. My own curse is heavy. My own curse is lonely. My own curse is bondage.
Jesus has already set me free.
But in the midst of darkness that truth can feel so far away. Seek Jesus.
Our world needs Christians to be Christ-like. Jesus was present with the people and vulnerable with others. Jesus comforted and loved powerfully. Jesus was full of the Spirit and led of the Spirit. Jesus reached out and walked with.
For those struggling in mental battles, you are not alone. Most people are. Seek Jesus. Jesus is always with you and your journey is not over – do NOT let the lies of the enemy tell you that your burden is too heavy for you to keep carrying. Jesus will carry your burden. Cast your cares upon the Lord, for HE cares for you. If you are choosing to self medicate, through drugs/alcohol/busyness/food – stop. Seek Jesus. Jesus will carry your burden. Cast your cares upon the Lord, for HE cares for you.
Your pains are never without purpose.
On more than one occasion, the enemy’s voice has held a microphone in my mind. Don’t let him hold one in yours.
Seek Jesus. Jesus will carry your burden. Cast your cares upon the Lord, for HE cares for you.
If you are not in one of these dark spots, be thankful, and listen to the Spirit as He leads you to people. He is calling you to call people because they are in a darkness that no one knows or understands.
Each of us must seek Jesus. Obey His Spirit.
If you do not know Jesus personally, relationally, today you can – seek Him and you will find Him when you seek Him with your whole heart.
Jesus will carry your burden. Cast your cares upon the Lord, for HE cares for you.
“But you will receive power when the Holy Spirit comes on you; and you will be my witnesses in Jerusalem, and in all Judea and Samaria, and to the ends of the earth.” Acts 1:8
We chose to go to Kenya when my husband’s work called for him to go. There was not a booming voice from Heaven or a loud earth-shattering moment. It just made practical sense to go where he was already going as a family on mission before his work began. So, we began to make plans. I am a big believer in joining God where He is already at work – like Henry Blackaby teaches in Experiencing God. And that is when the search began in connecting to different missions, ministries in Nairobi to see where my family of four and our dear friend could join in. Through all of my tireless searches for someone to need us, I met Bishop John Rampei and his wife, Jackie. I have to make a loud celebration statement to Tia & Gary Broughton for the introduction to Austin Henry who made the official introduction to Bishop Rampei. Thank you!
Left to right: Danielle Ogle, Heather and Joel Haley, Bishop Rampei and wife Jackie, Clif and Georgia Haley standing at the school Oloika School in Bishop Rampei’s home community.
We had many conversations before we embarked on our journey to Nairobi and we determined that the Lord was wanting us to lead a Pastor’s Wives Discipleship Conference for the 171 churches within the Maasai Tribe. Bishop and his wife oversee these churches and work diligently to support them with their needs and provide guidance in their faith. They had hosted many Pastors Conferences, but none for the wives. As many of you know, I am not a Pastor’s Wife, so out of the gate the Lord was working to reassure me that I would be embowered by the Holy Spirit to give these ladies exactly what He knew they needed. And so I began to pray.
Precept Ministries has meant much to my personal growth as a believer. About ten years ago I mentioned to my own Pastor’s wife the desire to go to seminary, and she asked me if I had ever heard of Precept. Which I had not. This changed my life and my walk as a young woman in Christ. For more intel on Precept, check out their website https://www.precept.org/. It will be a catalyst in your walk with the Savior. As I began searching for material we could cover, I needed something in Swahili. And guess what – Precept prints materials in Swahili. So quickly, I felt God move us to this material that covers Mark chapters 1-6, Experiencing His Touch.
And wouldn’t you know, they have an office in Nairobi where the books were delivered to before we ever arrived!
And now we had a plan! When you go on a mission trip to a place you’ve never been with a small group, you never really know what to expect. Our first day moved very slow as we were just getting acquainted with the new time zone and the pace of the people. As I have found in most places, they run on their own time, never the actual time on the clock. And when you take your children on trips like this, it is important to have many areas where they can find an outlet to have fun. Who’s kidding, adults need that too. Our first day, we went to the the well known tourist stop – The Giraffe Center. This is a very unique place to learn about giraffes and also feed them! And like a good mom, we try to stay places, every time we travel with a pool. Now, this was a mission trip and I make zero promises, but it just so happened that the hotel that Bishop Rampei uses for mission teams came with a pool. So, needless to say, my kids were pretty happy on day one.
Georgia and Joel feeding the giraffes at the Giraffe Center in Nairobi. AND the outstanding pool at our primary hotel, The Smith Hotel.
On Sunday, we were blessed to go to church in one of the churches in the Maasai Tribe. I am not certain exactly how long it took us to arrive from our hotel outside of Nairobi, but I feel confident it was every bit of 2.5 hours on many roads that were more like mountain climbing. Many times I wanted to send a message to my pal Steve Borden and Kristin Qualls thanking them for the amazing roads we have in East Tennessee. In many spots they were dirt roads, rocky roads, pot hole roads and the village churches and schools felt like they were a million miles from any civilization. But we arrived. And when we did, we found hundreds of believers gathered worshipping and celebrating our God. I had forgotten what it felt like when you visit a sweet place and you are the guest of honor. The Pastor, his wife and all of the elders of the church met us outside to shake our hands. They ushered us to the front of the church to sit in the row in front of the elders, gave us waters and made sure we were okay. The church celebrated us making the effort to come to their home. Many of the people of this village had never seen white people so they were very fascinated with our skin and our hair. Joel especially. I have learned that when you go abroad on mission trips any type of candy from America is a big hit. For church, I had brought a huge bag of candy canes and I felt like I caught a glimpse of what Jesus felt like navigating through the crowds when the lady with blood touched the hem of His garment for healing. I quickly became overwhelmed, and thankfully a church momma came to my rescue. It is very customary to gift your guests in the Maasai Tribe. We received our first gifts here at the church service, beautiful necklaces and bracelets made by hand. These are very high quality and something they take very seriously. It was truly an honor to receive. Also, per custom, we joined the elders and the choir ladies for African Tea after the service. It was amazing!!! Even Clif enjoyed a cup!
Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday were our primary mission days. We were devoted to leading the ladies conference on Monday and Tuesday and then on Wednesday visited two local schools. During the time of the conference, I realized that Maasai also have their own language, so by the end of the two days together we had covered five languages: English, Swahili, Maasai, Greek and Hebrew! At the beginning of our time together, I had asked if any of the women had ever participated in a Bible Study. And only three hands of the 70 women went up. At this point, I knew we were about to experience something really great. Danielle had asked me early on how I planned to lead this conference, and I quickly shared that I had no idea. I was hoping that the Lord would reveal His plans as we began to walk in it. And He sure did. I quickly felt comfortable with leading much like I lead studies here in America and the women appeared to love it. Laughing even at my silly jokes. I did feel a bit bad for my translator, David, as he and my sweet husband were the only men in room. Over and over again, the women were completely engaged and we were sharpening one another with the Holy Word of God as our edge. Jesus displays so much greatness throughout Mark chapters 1-3. Over and over again we see how experiencing Jesus never leaves anyone the same. And it is certain that none of us who spent time together will ever be the same. The Creator of the Universe united women from the most different worlds and the most opposite walks of life. Many of these women travelled hours to be together – some carpooled and some walked. The Pastors picked up as many as they could and then stayed to serve the ladies during this amazing time. Only the small babies stayed with us, so I know that childcare from afar was also a factor. We had three total sessions conquering the first three chapters of Mark. During our last session, we felt led to do prayer and anointing over each woman in attendance. The prayers of each of these women were both completely unique and cries of their hearts. Nothing about the oil was special. Nothing about two very white American girls praying over them was special. What was special is that each one felt seen. What was special was that our God showed up for each one. What was special was the elder women creating a hedge around each lady crying out to the Father for the family, food, money, passion for the Word, church, radical revival for their church, and so much more. Each woman was broken. Each woman was seen. And we were emptied out. The Precept ladies of my church gave an overwhelming donation before we left and my church gave a powerful donation – every dollar was needed to provide for the food, transportation and study materials for the conference. Bishop desired this to be the first of the many conferences geared towards each group of people within their tribal body of Christ. And it was definitely one to remember.
There was no air conditioning. The heat was a solid 95 degrees Fahrenheit. There was not running water for the washrooms (toilets) nor cushioned and cozy seats. The floors were dirt and the cattle were nearby. The flies were in abundance. The lunch (goat) of the two days was slaughtered out front. But the Power and the Spirit of God was there – and that took the main stage. Church and Christianity is about so much more than just showing up somewhere on Sunday. I heard a powerful sermon earlier this year about walking in the flow. I’ve never felt more in the flow of the desires of the Lord than I do in 2025. We’ve traveled more than ever, but we are walking in obedience in its fullness. Another sermon I heard this year spoke of investing into ministries around us so that we can also reap the benefits of their fruits. AND I LOVE THAT! How often do we give to support a ministry only to get a cool t-shirt? What if we gave before being asked? What if we gave our full 10% tithe to our church and then pour another 20% into ministries surrounding us? What if we actually gave to churches we weren’t members of because we felt compelled to? What if we gave massive portions of our incomes to ministries that we see first hand embodying Jesus? What if the church planned their mission work/trips the way they do their vacations? What if…..
I had no idea what God was planning to do with a families obedience to go where He said to go when He said to go there, but this was a catalyst for the female leaders of these churches to be empowered to reach and disciple the women in their congregations accordingly. We only finished half of the lesson so that they could go and finish the other half with the ladies of their church. They left with a mission. And I left with a new and rejuvenated purpose. The people of Kenya. The people of Maasai Tribe. The body of Christ in Kenya needs us. We as Americans have been richly blessed and we use our blessings to destroy ourselves. We create more debt, more clutter, more calories and more accessories. The Church in Kenya needs food, bibles, study materials, pens, and transportation for Pastors.
And we had the privilege to spend time with two schools. The first school, Oloika, was miles off of the main road that is the primary school for 150 children. Many walk miles to be here one way and do not receive breakfast or lunch at school. They are blessed to have water. This school does not have text books or black boards nor do the children have shoes. For $240 breakfast and lunch can be provided for all 150 children for three months. An amazing church has built two strong infrastructures for the children to potentially board here during the school months and can house up to 90 children, but it will cost $30/month/kid to cover the cost of boarding. These children loved playing soccer aka futbol and their candies! But I wanted nothing more than to order pizzas for everyone – but no Dominoes was nearby. I have always heard the phrase, “now that you have seen you are responsible.” It is now my job to give and encourage others to give. Can we as the body of Christ stop eating out a few times of month and pay for kids to have lunch at school? And not just any kids, but the kids you see below in blue.
How can you give? What can you do?
You can go. I can help you in planning your very basic trip to equip the saints of Kenya, Maasai Tribe.
Groups needed: Teams to minister to children and teenagers. Medical Clinic teams. More leadership development among Pastors and other church leaders. Anyone who can lead a bible study or host a vacation bible school.
You can give. Send to my Venmo and I will show you where you money is going – Bishop John Rampei and the 171 churches. @heather-haley-16
Items needed: $4 Precept books; $10 Bibles; $240 for school lunches; textbooks; blackboards; buildings for more ministry usage for Pastors and leaders; housing for leaders to stay at near the primary church; motorbikes for Pastors to easily get to all of the churches they are leading; more schools closer to the villages so the children do not have to walk 3 miles one way each day; and so much more.
You can purchase Maasai bibles – in their language. Many of these Pastor’s wives did not possess the Holy Word in their native tongue. You can purchase more Precept materials in Swahili.
You can pray. But really pray – add these requests to your prayer walls and your daily reminders.
Thank you for considering this a space to devote your time, energy, money and prayers. They love the Lord. And they could use a partner.
And let’s not forget, this is Kenya. Just down the road from where we had been ministering for three days, Bishop drives us five minutes off of the road for my husband to capture this shot…..
And don’t forget to check out my husband’s ETSY store to see ALL the greatness of God’s creation he was able to capture. And YES I have been married to a photographer for a long time and appreciate seeing the back of the camera! https://www.etsy.com/shop/CliftonHaleyPhoto?section_id=39963622
We had the privilege on our last night to stay in an actual Safari Game Camp in Maasai Mara. I HIGHLY recommend. And it was the perfect way to wrap up a powerful week among God’s creation with His people. Mission trips with kids are just a way of life for us – I want my kids to experience every discipline and command of Christ before leaving my home. He says, “be my witnesses in Jerusalem, and in all Judea and Samaria, and to the ends of the earth.” Yes, that means local and abroad. Plan your mission trips the way you plan your vacations. He commanded us. And it is a command that when we obey is maybe more beneficial to our hearts and minds than one could ever fathom. Be available to Him. Be willing. Let tomorrow look different than today. Let God use you in the ways He created and watch the peace fill your heart, soul and family.
“Seek first His Kingdom and all these things will be added unto you” … says Jesus.
It all started with a broken mirror, my leg through the back deck and the death of Maggie Smith.
I am 39 years old and one month. I have only 11 more months left of my thirties. I LOVE slowing down long enough to attempt to take stock of my status and situation. I am hoping to better sit in the days of my 39th year, more than ever before. These last days of my thirties come with a deep longing to finalize a season of my life and embrace the next by building a new foundation of joy and surrender. Tonight, I had the glorious privilege to celebrate two people who have poured into me in my most formative years and their residual effect has an ongoing and ever-present indelible mark on mine and my husband’s lives. As I looked at the small sampling of lives they had touched, which I hope to speak on in a very near future day, I was forced to encounter the things that really matter in this life.
Relationships and true rest matters.
My childhood was FUN. Full of mission, dreams, purpose and constant laughter. My college years was also incredibly fun full of leading young ladies closer to Jesus and attending the greatest university ever, UT Knoxville. My young adult years were full of adventure with a mix of a bit of sorrow along the way. As I am knocking on the “over the hill” age, I must review and determine what do the next days look like.
My whole life I have ran hard – hard towards success and busyness. I am one that has always struggled with stillness and slowness. I am one that finds it quite challenging to just “be”. As Dr. Dalton-Smith states in Sacred Rest, “I am prone to overdo things. I overplan every family vacation. I do everything to the utmost. I take to the extreme those situations that are content being small. Small intimidates me.” And I could not possibly agree with this more! I have trained myself for the last nine years to squeeze in as much as possible into the 24 hours given every single day. I ran so intensely, that this summer I realized I was one year older than I had actually thought. In one summer, I went from being 37 years old to having a few months left of being 38. That’s a problem. And now that I am thoroughly 39 years old, it is time that I unlearn the skill of maximizing every single day and find a path that leads to success in stillness and rest. When you are constantly running, relationships suffer, no matter how hard you try to protect them.
“Life is hard to appreciate without the pressing,” says Dr. Saundra Dalton-Smith in Sacred Rest.
I dare say my last 9 years have been full of constant pressing. I won’t take the time to go into those details – read previous blogs for details – I tend to cope with humanity and life via writing. It is my way. And if someone can benefit, I am truly blessed. I have been given more than one lady deserves to be blessed with. I have an outstanding family, true and genuine faith, successful career, strong tribe, adventurous home and abundant life. I have been given opportunities that many dream of. I have seen many sites and embraced many unlike myself. I have more appreciation today than ever before in my short 39 years of life.
Some of my most recent pressing cases lie in the morning of my 39th birthday. I awake after three hours of sleep due to yet another delayed flight home to find my mirror in my bathroom leaning away from the wall and headed for actual doom. By the grace of God, it snugly propped itself against an item my husband had left plugged up. And now, I am faced with the fact that a controlled break is always better than an uncontrolled one – so I had to move the massive mirror in order to protect myself from the hundreds of shards of glass that would definitely await me if I delayed the movement. So, I did it – I broke a large mirror on my birthday. Which in superstition land, brings many years bad luck. Now, to speak of the fact that I later stepped through a wooden piece on my deck due to the heavy rains and great need for replacement wood and that I am still nursing the bruise from that endeavor, doesn’t reflect the broken mirror. OR that later that day one of the greatest actresses Maggie Smith passed away, I am sure that wasn’t a reflection of the mirror. OR any of the other really dreadful moments…. because broken mirrors mean nothing, right? 🙂 Well, in this case, it meant before thirty days was up, my sweet mother-in-law had completely redesigned and redecorated the bathroom and bedroom master suite.
I digress. Now onto more important things – I just finished a book that I would like to take a moment to HIGHLY recommend, Sacred Rest by Dr. Dalton-Smith. This book provided many of the answers I needed and direction my soul desired at this season of my life. She speaks of the importance of physical rest, sensory rest, mental rest, emotional rest, spiritual rest, social rest, and creative rest. In the beginning you get the privilege of taking a quiz – in which I failed in every category but one when I took it this summer.
I found a new life motto:
“I never again want to bring the toxins of work life into the sanctuary of my home. I’ve made this a key part of my rest strategy. My home and my life are far from perfect, but they are worth protecting from unrest.” says Dr. Saundra Dalton-Smith in Sacred Rest.
“Victory is Coming” is a statement that has been molded into the fabric of my heart and mind over these last few years. Victory doesn’t always look like what we imagine or what we write on a sheet of paper. Victory may not look like victory to all who are watching. Victory is defined as an act of defeating an opponent or enemy. As you all know, I am a believer in Jesus Christ and believe strongly that we are always fighting against one enemy in this world. Victory is when the true enemy is defeated – but also, each war has many small victories along the way. As a believer in Jesus and a follower of Him, we are always pursuing obedience, and each moment of obedience brings victory.
I have started this new season with the following:
Making a work change that will bring a better work and life balance in bringing me back to my home base.
Redecorating and redesigning my bedroom space to reflect the level of importance this space should have in my life.
Prioritizing my time of study and prayer with the Word of God and the Lord Himself.
Giving my husband and children the best of me and not the leftovers.
Eating foods that fuel my body and not destroy it.
Walking and exercising daily.
Prioritizing my own rest and creating a space for me.
Taking herbal supplements that create a better version of me.
READING consistently again.
Relationships matter. Make them a priority. People are needed in your life to keep it full and help you stay obedient.
My prayer is that each day I am focused on what matters most. Every day needs a new amount of grace. Thankfully, the Lord’s mercies are new every morning.
In conclusion, the mirror triggered the physical change to the beginning of my emotional and mental state of mind – rest. The leg is still bruised from going through the back porch deck, and Lord Willing, the deck gets repaired soon. And Maggie Smith is still a legendary actor, may she rest in peace.
Please disregard the mess of my counter tops – survival mode here, folks. OR don’t disregard and judge me – I am okay with that. OR don’t disregard and relate with me to toooooo many things taken over my peace. Either way, it’s all good and the bathroom looks totally different today.
In today’s time, we have a logo for everything. Every program, every service line, every business and church. It represents everything. It is to encompass the very essence of that organization or product. But what would the Creator’s logo be? What about the Savior’s logo? Or the Comforter’s logo? Do they have an image?
Here are some options:
The cross.
The world.
The clouds.
Humanity.
The wind.
LIGHT.
Blood.
The sound of a newborn.
Are these the logos of God?
What is a logo? Definition: A logo is a visual mark that distinguishes a company, organization, product, or brand. (According to google)
Does Jesus have a brand? An image? Does He need one?
Everything in this world is consumed with marketing an image to deliver a message to provoke an action.
Let me say it again.
Everything in this world is consumed with marketing an image to deliver a message to provoke an action.
What are we promoting or marketing? What message are we sharing? What action are we desiring from those around us? Here is a thought that has crossed my mind – what if everything we did ONLY promoted the Name of Jesus…. How would the world look different?
Philippians 2:9-11
“For this reason also, God highly exalted Him, and bestowed on Him the name which is above every name, so that at the name of Jesus every knee will bow, of those who are in heaven and on earth and under the earth, and that every tongue will confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father.
If we are Christians, we are called to be the evidence and residence of Jesus. Do we reflect the evidence and residence of Jesus?
What name are we more concerned with promoting than Jesus? If we believe that His Name is the only Name that saves, then why do we concern ourselves promoting any other name?”
John 14:6
“Jesus said to him, “I am the way, and the truth, and the life; no one comes to the Father but through Me.”
Acts 4:12
“And there is salvation in no one else; for there is no other name under heaven that has been given among men by which we must be saved.”
Either we believe this or we don’t. If we do, then we believe Jesus is the Messiah and we should look, be, act and see different. So, if this is true, anything else we put above this Name is idol worship. Are we pushing another name other than Jesus Christ?
I ask again, what would Jesus’ logo be? Would we dare put it on our cars, shirts, hats or backpacks? How would we approach His Name differently if we believe His Name truly possesses the power we say it does?
This leads me into great thought and inner dialogue with myself asking who or whom do I represent?